The Exile Years

Your past will always catch up to you. Mine did today. Two Internet entrepreneur friends from Europe came by the Bay Area for a chat at Sushi Ran in Sausalito. I haven't seen them more than a few times since the days we used to work together in Stockholm, in the evolving mid-90's.

We had all gained some weight (sorry, guys) since our early 30's but everything else was pretty much the same. Oh, except for the experience and individual growth. In our talks it felt like time never happened. 1996 felt like yesterday but with a much more mature and honest perspective. All the material things aside, that's what we bring through life, our ability to learn and grow from our mistakes.

So my answer to the question "What are you going to do next?" has to be: Make more mistakes! There is no better way to learn.

The Leaps of Life

There are several ways of navigating through life's challenges to get to the endgame. Well, eventually the endgame will be the very same for all of us - death. But before that happens we all have to make a decision about the direction, content and target.

Right now I'm right inbetween my old and my new life which is a very comfortable place to be. I can with pleasure look back at the past half decade and enjoy the achievements and memories as well as dream about the next 5 years with a glass of St-Julien. I don't really have to do anything productive but trying to make sense of the past, present and the future.

Time, in the short-term, is only important to linear people. Time as measured in tick-tock, tick-tock. But if you look at time in the concept of leaps - of huge disruptive jumps - then time becomes unlimited. The key is to find the right space for that time. It's not time spent that should be valued but impact. How do you measure impact? In cold hard cash, baby!

The Life of an Ex-Yahoo!

The email that I've been formulating in the back of my mind about leaving Yahoo! left my mailbox today at 10.14am PDT. It was the toughest email I've ever written. How do you sum up +6 years of working for the coolest Internet company in the world? How do you describe your gratitude and thanks to all the passionate, smart and ambitious people that you have relied on and vice versa?

Well, I guess you can't if you don't want to write a novel. But putting something into writing was important to communicate the formal ending of this chapter of my life. An exit is not the end but the beginning of something new, very often thanks to that very past that the ending is symbolizing. It's thanks to my time at Yahoo! that I can continue to pursue my passions in life - personal as well as professional. I'd say that is the ultimate achievement!

Cancelled Roadtrip

I've in the back of my mind been planning the true Southwestern roadtrip for quite some time. I think close to 10-15 years. Leaving SF heading down on the beautiful Pacific Highway in a fast sportscar, top down. Stopping in quaint places such as Santa Cruz (visit buddy Joe), Carmel (Bernardos Lodge) and then further down, passing the Big Sur and Santa Barbara. Maybe make a sideways trip to the wine country there before hitting Los Angeles.

After a few days on the coastal route we would turn 90 degrees and head east to Palm Springs and then to Tucsan for Mexican food, golf and desert. From Tucsan we would go to Phoenix (visit buddy Jaan w/ wife) and then Vegas, baby, to try out my new Texas Hold 'em skills.

After all the fear and loathing Death Valley sounds like the right destination and then up through Yosemite and back to San Francisco. I'd say the perfect fall trip but it doesn't look like we'll make it this year.

On The Menu

Lamb chops sprinkled with Kosher salt, garlic and rosemary
Gratin Dauphinois
Arugula salad with vinaigrette
A bottle of Chateau Lalande-Borie

The Last Trading Hour

As the sun starts to come out behind all the clouds in the bay YHOO, SYBR and NFLX are making a run for it. It's beautiful to watch a trading plan come together, bringing fundamental, technical, market psychology, game theory and money management into play. Today has been (and still is) a great day and I'm expecting tomorrow to be both glorious as well as directional. We are at the crossroads, folks. Time to make your bets!

Monday Morning Epiphany

It's another wonderful Northern California fall morning with blue sky and above 70 degrees. I experienced an epiphany while reading the article about the french gaming company Gameloft in this morning's WSJ. My flash experience didn't have anything to do with that company in particular but triggered a glimpse of hope. Hope as in drive, not as in lottery, religion or glory.

I had the mind-blowing vision of that everything is possible, that the sky's the limit. But it manifested itself in a much clearer vision than it has over the past few years. I saw a light-weight lifestyle, a much more simplistic way with the pure essentials in our ownership. In the time of mass consumption and shopping as the cure to boredom, liberating yourself from ownership might be the only right thing to do. Marx was right after all: perfection comes when ownership is abolished (freely translated).

But the shedding of all the physical luggage was just one part of the epiphany. The other part was more revenue-oriented to speak survival and thrival lingo. I saw a Jerry Maguire-ish worklife with passion AND money being the reward, the drive and the thrill.

Bud Fox said it well in the excellent movie 'Wall Street': When have you ever stepped out in the world and staked your claim?

In The Midst of The Siesta Hour

The missus is off on one of her fashion shows and I've just poured myself a glass of Muscat from our visit to Australia last year. The Cohiba is lit up but a little dry cause the humifier went dry. Simply cause and effect - I should have known.

It's 74 degrees outside and the sun is bursting through the protective blinds surrounding our apartment windows. I've opened up some of them to let in the calm fall breeze. This could be Cuba, Miami or Buenos Aires right now. I've my favorite playlist blasting out "Outro Lado' by Zuco 103 from the oversized and underutilized 4-feet tower speakers.

My mind has been preocupied with work, future house purchase and everything else rational, practical, planning-oriented, taking-care-of-your-family kind of stuff. I hate the logical planning; I wish I just had a closet full of dough that I could visit when I needed more. A never ending source of currency so I could focus my attention on the things that I really care about: food, wine, travels, cigars, writing, movies, dinners, interesting conversations, music, vintage sport cars, innovative technology (could be a better tooth brush) and just instant living.

Sometimes I wish life was as easy as the smoothest bossa nova song, slowly tip-toeing over the hot sand to get to the cooling Margarita bar across the beach. Solely wearing a pair of speedo's, a pair of oversized sunglasses and a thin Guavera shirt with a single pocket for the hotelroom key and a cigar. The lighter I'll get at the bar. One needs some sort of carrot in the life of no externally poised demands.

I can see a big white truck on the Golden Gate bridge from our pad. Most likely just the reflection of another SUV coming into the city carring yet another Silicon Valley worker, his wife - constantly on the phone - and a handful of kids watching TV on the LCD screens in the backseat. All heading for the buffe at Alfie's to enjoy Sunday togetherness.

'La Revancha del Tango" by Gotan Project has replaced the Brazilian vibes; giving a glimpse of hope, that even if the fall is decending on our pale working bodies the spring is rising in the land of passion.

Mac is Back And Biking is On

Mid-70's and a blue fall sky pulled me away from setting up my newly repaired Mac Mini. It's been at the 'shop' for about 2 weeks and has been surely missed. I dropped it off at the Apple Store on the day when the new iPod Nano was released and picked it up when the iPod Video was released.

The new video capabilities and content in the new iTunes 7.0 is killer. Not enough content yet, but all episodes of Lost and Desperate Housewives will be enough for a while. They should add all Friends, Frasier, CSI's and Nip / Tuck after that.

We are in the beginning of a very powerful rich media revolution where companies such as Netflix and Apple is going to challenge the established networks and create higher customer value. Getting all my rich media via the Internet is very convenient.

The bike ride was awesome; just the right temperature and enough sun to make it a challenging pleasure to ride for 30 minutes. Yeah, it's not that long but it's only the third time this season so I'll take it easy until i feel more comfortable with the bike and with my physical status. I went down all the hills and over to Crissy Fields and back. Only walked the two steepest hills on the way back. Not bad.

Nuisance For The Elderly

People don't realize that men also struggle with getting older. It's not anything fancy like menopause or saggy butts. Nope, it can be as simple as having your noise clogged up by a bunch of wild nose hairs.

Nose hair is not talked about that much (these days) - by men or women - but it is a true nuisance on par with small talk and people that don't use their blinkers when they are planning to turn. Or women in their 20's talking on their phones whilst driving. You get the point!

I think we really need to dare to share these kind of things. Maybe next Thanksgiving could be a great opportunity. It has to come out in the open at some point that more than 50% of the human kind (not counting all women that might have / get nose hairs) will have this symtom at some point in their lives.

DVD's I'd Like to Own

Ownership in the world of digital media hasn't really been on the top of my list when you can borrow, copy or rent most of what your heart or mind desires. But there are a few TV-shows that I'd like to own, to claim mine so I can in the spur of the moment watch them over and over again:

1. Frasier - His everyday concerns and shortcomings are mine. It's probably the most intelligent show (together with CSI) ever made.
2. CSI (the original) - Talk about the devil is in the details. I'm addicted to this show. Yesterday they had a 4-hour marathon including the special directed by Quentin Tarantino.
3. Friends - So simply, a show just about being good friends and how challenging it can be. The coffee shop is our sanctum.

So why TV-shows? Well, they run about 22 (Frasier and Friends) or 44 minutes (CSI) net commercials. That's the perfect time to take a break from anything. They are easily digestable due to their well known context and characters. They're also rewarding - the more you watch the more of the hidden clues and relationships you see and understand. The sounds and tone is also very comforting eventhough CSI can be very dramatic and gruesome in many ways.

[Food & Wine] Stir-Fried Sesame Chicken

Serves 3-4 people
Preparation time: 10 minutes (chicken + sauce)
Cooking time: 20 minutes (rice), 7-8 minutes (chicken)

1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1-inch cubes
1 1/2 teaspoon cornstarch
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 green bell peppar, cored, seeded and cut into 1-inch pieces
1/3 cup soy sauce
1/3 cup sesame seed paste
2 tablespoons sesame oil
2 tablespoons chicken stock or water
1 teaspoon chili sauce
2 tablespoons dry cherry sesame seeds, to garnish
2 cups of jasmine rice

1. Clean and then cook the rice for 20 minute. Start prepping the chicken ingredients.

2. Place the chicken in a bowl, sprinkle with the cornstarch and toss until all the pieces are evenly coated. Heat the oil in a wok and stir-fry the chicken over a high heat for 45 seconds. Use a slotted spoon to remove the chicken from the wok and set aside.

3. Add the bell pepper and stir-fry over moderate heat for 1 minute. Stir in 2 tablespoons of the soy sauce, then remove the bell pepper with a slotted spoon and set aside.

4. Add the remaining soy sauce, the sesame seed paste, sesame oil, stock or water, chili sauce, and sherry. Cook, stirring for 1 minute, then replace the chicken and stir over a high heat for about 45 seconds. Stir in the reserved bell pepper and cook for a further 30 seconds or until the pepper is just tender.

5. Transfer the chicken mixture to a serving dish and garnish with the sesame seed. Serve immediately.

The Limitations of Biking

I don't feel that sore after my 15-minute bike stunt yesterday. I just wanted to tease the body into wanting more. Like serving a fat person (sorry - should be more pc and use obese) whipped cream before dinner to get the salivating going.

The only drawback is that biking forces you to give up things such as wine drinking and cigarr smoking in the close time vicinity of the exercise. I once tried to just casually go for a ride to a friends house and since it was Friday I lit up a phattie and rolled down the hill. Not to recommend. Hold off until you get off the bike to avoid the inhaling equal to 10 big cubans. In it's favor, it gives you a big buzz if you can survive the lack of oxygen. Most people cannot.

The 15-Minute Bike Ride

Finally, after all promises and guarantees I can with proudness in my voice and with an honesty more pure than whitening say: I biked today, honey. It wasn't anything dare-devilish or marathon-like. Just a quick bike ride around the block to get the heart pumping. And it sure did. I reached close to exhaustion after 10 minutes. Not that great but I've started the long journey back to being fit as a teen. So kudos for me.

The short bike ride also resulted in probably one of the most productive days I've had in a long time, knocking of things on the to-do list like never before. And with all that pure oxygen pumping through my body I believe I'm going to sleep like a baby tonight.


PS. Right now preparing oven-roasted stuffed peppars with rice and a fabolous guacamole salsa.

To Slack Or Not - Not

Slacking, the missus explained, is when you are doing what you love to do. It's far from being lazy. This truly confirms two things: I married the right missus and that looking for love in work is the right thing to do.

I remember the days I worked 18 hours a day, maybe more and it felt like a walk in the park. Why? I tell you why punk: passion, love, interest, camaraderie, changing the world et cetera. People say it all the time. Focus your energy, knowledge and time on things you love and success will come. I couldn't agree more. Tonight I made a Rösti for the third time ever and it was absolutely amazing. Practise makes perfect and passion is the spice to use.

The Shopping Cure

I've never believed that shopping could actually cure the sense of blue. But this morning we headed off - the missus and I - downtown to knock of a few things off the to-do list. I had a few practical items that turned into pure fashion statements and a great sense of relief and accomplishment. I'm still puzzled by how I feel about this. It wasn't anything expensive or crazy, just two t-shirts, a pullover and a pair of corduroy jeans. But all of the items were very distinct, had a great fit and felt original.

Now I suddenly feel new and energized. This is something I've looked for in new experiences and learnings in the past, not in clothes. Now I just need to get a haircut and shave of 10 pounds and then I'm happening. Again. Go Dog!

PS. I did have a pre-printed list with sizes, stores and preferred brands which created a great feeling of security. What can I say, I'm a numbers guy and demand logic and consistency.